Never fail to remember:
I was not pining for you. I was not “hung up” on you. I didn’t spend all that time wishing I had you back.
I was mad. I was hurt. You dealt me a huge blow, you wounded me. All that time I spent being sad was recovery. I was healing.
Do not confuse healing with pining. Wishing you were back, after the hurt you caused, would’ve just made the wound deeper.